Major shift and download. I feel that my knee is back in alignment. FINALLY! The surrounding tissues are getting reacquainted after two weeks of being at the extreme point of tension.
Body needs to eliminate all inflammation. By doing so the body only knows the whole so when aiming for specific tissue, other tissues are healed along the way. I can feel the inflammation leaving my body, top down. I feel my spine realigning.
I stayed in bed this morning for a while working on physical therapy type movements, isometrics, and a little bit of massage. I then just laid straight down on my left side with my right leg on top of left. I kept breathing deeply as I allowed my left knee to press gently into my right knee at the medial meeting line and bring skeleton into balance. It felt like a huge rush of light energy through my body. A release. I realized that my vascular system had been taxed heavily for the past two weeks. Having also taken my nervous system for a ride. I could feel the blood pumping hard to move the circulatory system to clean. To remove the debris. To clean up the internal mess, as it were. My body is returning to equilibrium.
Nervous system has been on high alert, pushing people away, being brusque. Not my best qualities when they flare. I only show it to people I know love me unconditionally. God bless them for sticking with me.
Having fantasies about chopping vegetables near the edge of earth, waves in earshot. Wanting to get in my car with a small suitcase and arrive under the trees. Eliminate the sounds of ambulances and car alarms. Haven’t been in my car in two weeks. Haven’t been outside much in two weeks. Almost went out today, but wanted to stay supine as much as possible, and not do anything to tax any of my systems until I feel solid.
The systems are resetting. Reconfiguration in progress.
And this writing? What is this about? I can’t predict. I just know it’s what I’m doing now, and I’m just going to continue doing it and see what happens. Seems like what I’m supposed to do. Feels good.
I had this story model idea. I have a visual of it as well. Curved line of a spine with intersecting lines going in different directions. Causing the twists. Feeling pulled in many directions. With this realization, I understood the importance of maintaining the body with ease, strength and love. Will sketch it out later and post it with this post.
There are many other inputs and actions that I am not putting here. I am censoring, for many reasons. Learning balance. I am also writing a parallel story *maybe a book way off in the future* that is private now, and holds other details of the same events, like footnotes to these blog posts. Even writing this I feel my spine snapping into alignment in the minuscule crevices deep below the place where the small bones meet. I feel healthy fluids filling spaces in my body, escorting out the sickness. It’s taking some big bouncers to escort out these thugs. I feel my blood cleaning itself. I feel the oxygen exiting with force, evaporating pain. Deep exhales. I feel the wiggles releasing my nervous system, freedom to move in ways that may look weird *I made chair dance video earlier…felt great….I MISS DANCING***
I started dancing in my *Herman Miller Office/Wheel Chair* Felt so good to move the rest of my body, knowing my leg is supported. First song that randomly came on: Love Action, Human League. Today it was my celebration song. I lam loving my body back to health. I took in all the love coming to me from every direction and channeled it into healing. I found a way to tap into it.
Ohhh…and I jotted this down…I wasn’t supposed to believe in the hocus-pocus. But then the hocus-pocus started working, and life got easier.